In this New
York Times article, Emily Layden tells a story about her sixth
grade brother’s friend posting a status on Facebook asking them to “LIKE if you
hate” Emily’s brother. Shockingly, 57 people liked the status, confirming their
“hatred” for Emily’s brother. Without a doubt, it would be incredibly damaging to
a child’s self-esteem and self-worth to learn that 57 kids “hate” him or her. As an adult, I couldn't imagine how this would
affect me today. Sometimes, it seems
like it truly is “social warfare” out there for today’s youth, where social media
is one of the strongest weapons in any potential enemy’s arsenal.
Does the boy who started this chain of “hate” for Emily’s
brother grasp the extent of the harm he has caused? Do his 57 peers understand
what that simple click of the mouse truly means? Could you imagine 57 children
lining up at the cafeteria to tell one child they “hate” them? This would never
happen, right? Herein lies the power of
social media messages, both positive and negative. Simply put, it is so easy to spread the word, and as a result, bullying messages are
spread at lightning speed. In the
cafeteria or classroom, a responsible adult usually takes notice and steps in.
Alas, in the world of social media, it is quite difficult to take notice and
step in before the damage is done.
So why are children so readily spreading these hate messages
through social media? Perhaps it’s the
anonymity, perhaps it seems less harmful you can’t see the victim’s reaction or
maybe it’s the freedom from adult supervision in the cyber world.
The question that has been asked over and over again by
parents and educators is what do we do about this? Should we simply ban the use of social media
for our children? Unfortunately, this is
nothing more than a band-aid solution. When
addressing difficult situations like this we need to ask ourselves if our “solution” is really designed to teach our children, or does
it just make our lives easier by making the problem go away. We
need to seize every teachable moment we can, and cyberbullying is packed with teachable
moments. Below is a list of some things
you can try to both prevent cyberbullying and address if it does occur:
Parents
& Educators UNITE!
Note to parents: Cyberbullying is not only the teacher’s problem to deal with
Note to educators: Cyberbullying is not only the parent’s problem to deal with
Note to parents: Cyberbullying is not only the teacher’s problem to deal with
Note to educators: Cyberbullying is not only the parent’s problem to deal with
Students
UNITE!
Create connected school communities offline by helping your students get to know each other, unite as a team and foster positive relationships. Students are less likely to act like a bully when they see each other as friends. Even more powerful is the fact that other students are less likely to laugh with the bully, participate in the bullying, or stand idly by when they see the ‘victim’ as a friend.
Create connected school communities offline by helping your students get to know each other, unite as a team and foster positive relationships. Students are less likely to act like a bully when they see each other as friends. Even more powerful is the fact that other students are less likely to laugh with the bully, participate in the bullying, or stand idly by when they see the ‘victim’ as a friend.
Hold
your children accountable for their decisions:
Whether online or offline, choices must be addressed and accompanied by consequences. Notice here that we say “choices” not necessarily “bad choices”. A good choice, like treating each other with respect should be accompanied by a good consequence. Similarly, bad choices, like posting a negative online status a peer, should bring a negative consequence that creates an opportunity for learning.
Whether online or offline, choices must be addressed and accompanied by consequences. Notice here that we say “choices” not necessarily “bad choices”. A good choice, like treating each other with respect should be accompanied by a good consequence. Similarly, bad choices, like posting a negative online status a peer, should bring a negative consequence that creates an opportunity for learning.
